[sudo-discuss] Conflict Resolution Proposal and Conflict Awareness 1, 2 and 3

[Patrick Schmidt]

Dear fellow Sudoers,

although my 3Dimensial Body left the continent and spontaneously
emmigrated to Asia
(Updates on Chinese Hackerspaces and Community Spaces to follow),
my consciousness is still around.

I was a little bit sad two weeks ago to read in the meeting minutes
that one name alone was listed under "conflict resolution". I assume
that this was done in the absence of our fellow sudoer. I find this a
little problematic to be exposed like this and would propose the
following:

As conflicts (not wanting to talk about inner conflicts within one
person) are always among minimum two entities, in case of a conflict
all names of all parties involved should be mentioned, and not only
the accused (especially in their absence).


Conflict awareness 1 :

Rejecting a person and not being able to handle a disagreement with
compassion reveales a lot about one self.
In 99% of the cases the Ego jumps in and goes with separation and
rejection as the behaviour of the rejected entity triggers us, in
other words:
we subconsciously reject others because their behaviour reminds us on
what we do not like about ourselves.

In this context, lets expand our consciousness and our compassion,
and next time we get angry ask ourselves:
"what is it within me that is triggered right now by that persons behaviour"

Conflict awareness 2 :

Everybody lives in their own universe, and an interesting metaphor for
people is to comparing them with atoms.
In the quantum world of atoms strange rules reign, even things that
contradict each other can be true in the same time.
So this superposition of realities that contradict each other but
simultaneously are true can be applied on human conflicts:
both entities have their own side of the story which contradict each
other, but yet they can still be true at the same time. (Lesson
learned from the first public Sudo conflict)

Conflict Awareness 3:

Often during a conflict when the egos collide it can get nasty,
especially when the ego feels threatened it will accuse, blame,
judge,...

A good strategy is instead of acusing a person directly,
just talk about your feelings and your inner states what the persons behaviour
made you feel.

In this case, the argument which is likely to follow ("no, this is not true")
is not valid, as your feelings are your feelings and they are true in
your universe no matter what.

------------------------------------
just felt like sharing these lessons I learned, and I want to thank
Sudo crowd for my personal development that especially the conflicts
triggered, Im much more Zen, get angry much less at people, also do
not identify with my anger but can see how the ego sneacks in...

sending you cosmic love from the other side of our beautiful planet,
Patrick