[sudo-discuss] Erotica: superiority and inferiority: hands vs.partners:

[Sonja Trauss]

You got it! Dealing with people is HARD. It's MESSY. It's RISKY.

Here I was thinking, 'sonja, you paranoid jerk, is porn really a "scab"'?
But, yeah... there you go.
On May 6, 2013 3:19 AM, "GtwoG PublicOhOne" <g2g-public01 at att.net> wrote:

>
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> Yo's-
>
> So let's talk about the reasons we might prefer partners and the reasons
> we might prefer hands:
>
> Anyone who's grown up with popular music knows the ideal of Romantic
> Love:  The perfect relationship, each person fully attuned to the
> other.  Great sex all the time, and great conversation all the time,
> though not necessarily both at the same time.  Hearts & flowers until
> death do us part, whether or not the state or one's employers recognizes
> the relationship.
>
> But for the most part, reality doesn't work that way, as the divorce
> rate demonstrates.
>
> A hand is always preferable to an abusive partner.
>
> A hand is often preferable to playing HIV roulette, and nowadays,
> massively-drug-resistant gonorrhea roulette, not to mention hepatitis C
> and other life-threatening diseases, some of which can even be caught
> from a (slurpy) kiss.
>
> A hand may be preferable to the competitive game-playing of the sexual
> "marketplace," where commodification is often the rule, particularly in
> a culture where "revenge porn" has become commonplace (posting nudes of
> one's former partners and "conquests" online for all the world to see,
> against their will) and cruel gossip spreads at the speed of recycled
> electrons.
>
> For that matter a hand or two might be preferable to a partner who's
> sexually inept, or of the opposite political or philosophical persuasion
> than oneself, or who isn't strong, smart, creative, empathic, or
> otherwise capable in at least one way that matters to oneself.
>
> After a particularly painful relationship breakup, a hand may be
> retrospectively preferable to the wild ride that ended with the
> going-insane feeling of being dumped or betrayed.
>
> And it's probably arguable, as a generalization, that a hand that meets
> a basic physical need, is far better all round, than letting the need go
> unmet to the point where it builds relentlessly, thereby infecting one's
> every glance at another person, and one's every conversation.  In other
> words, masturbation is not only a personal good thing but a social good
> thing when it enables one to keep his/her objectivity rather than
> viewing others first and foremost as possible sexual outlets.
>
> Let's hear it for using our hands and keeping our objectivity!
>
> -G.
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